All the money in the world couldn’t buy Mariah Carrie class, or a lick of sense for that matter. Mimi is seen here in Aspen this past week wearing what looks like sale items from Baby Gap. Mariah’s body was past it’s prime over 15 years ago, but apparently no one around her has informed her of this. It’s wrong.

Paris Hilton continued here spiral down the D-List Friday night, when she was turned away from Ian Schrager’s Gramercy Park Hotel.

According to Page Six, Hilton had been partying at Marquee earlier that evening and was drunk on “lots of vodka and pineapple juice”, when she decided to join Orlando Bloom, Winona Ryder and Josh Lucas at the Gramercy’s Rose Bar to continue the night’s festivities. But when Hilton arrived at the hotel, she was stopped at the door by a bouncer and denied entery. According to sources, hotel owner Schrager has a strict policy which specifically states “the likes of Paris Hilton and her ilk are not welcome here.”

Hilton, who obviously doesn’t know when to quit, continued to embarrass herself Sunday night when she attempted to crash a party at actress Milla Jovovich’s townhouse. Unfortunately for Hilton, she arrived after the bash was over. Oops! Someone needs to remind Hilton she’s in New York, not L.A. We’ve always maintained higher standards in regards to what is “hot”.

Source: New York Post: Page Six

Photo: x17online.com

Paris Hilton was arrested in Hollywood at 12:30am last night on suspicion of Driving Under the Influence. The arresting officer said “The officers observed that Hilton exhibited the symptoms of intoxication. A field sobriety test was conducted at the scene and the officers determined she was driving under the influence.” Hilton was booked then released and picked up by her sister Nick Hilton.

Photo: x17online.com

Paris later called into the On Air with Ryan Seacrest show on LA’s KIIS-FM and told him that she “may have been driving a little fast” in her Mercedes McLaren SLR, but “it was only because she wanted a burger.”

She went on to defend her actions by saying she had an “excruciatingly long day on Wednesday filming the video for her new single Nothing in This World” and when shooting wrapped she went to dinner with sister Nicky, attended a charity event hosted by Dave Navarro and had one margarita. Hilton says she drove home after and may have been going a bit fast because she was “starving” and just wanted “an In-N-Out Burger.”

Uhm, what did the bitch do during dinner with her sister, stare at the food? No, she probably did some lines and a couple of bus boys. As for that “charity event”, Paris was photographed last night partying at the Suicide Girls 5 year anniversary party. I guess in her world getting drunk at a party for a bunch of retro, goth, softporn hookers classifies as a charity event.

Source: TMZ

For video of this dumb ho after the arrest go here: x17online.com

It’s just not her week. Paris Hilton is the latest target of British graffiti artist Banksy’s rip on pop culture celebrities and the art world. In his latest prank, Banksy doctored 500 of Paris Hilton’s new CDs in select cities across the U.K. and replaced the liner notes with his own artwork and remixes. The sticker on the front of the CD lists the featured songs as “Why Am I Famous?”, “What have I done?” and “What am I for?”

According to a source who acquired one of the bogus CDs ( which like any hazardous material has since been pulled off store shelves ), “Instead of Ms Hilton’s own compositions, the replacement CD features 40 minutes of a basic rhythm track over which Banksy has dubbed Ms Hilton’s catch-phrase ‘That’s hot!’ and other extracts from her reality TV program The Simple Life.”

In the altered CD cover, Paris is portrayed topless and the CD lining has her head replaced with that of her pet chihuahua Tinkerbell. Now that’s hot!

View more of Banksy’s new and improved Paris makeover here: Read more »

First her album flops, now Paris Hilton is being denied entrance to A List clubs. could the F List be far behind? Paris and Fat Elvis look-a-like Brandon “Firecrotch” Davis, were denied entry to a VMAs after-party at Bungalow 8 last Thursday night. Pictures of a clearly distraught Paris along with davis and Diddy-Puffy-Sean Jean-Whoever ( who was also denied ) surfaced online today.

Davis apparently had a fit when his drunken, fat ass couldn’t find a McDonald’s near by to “comfort” his frustration and the cops had to be called in to control with a cattle prod. Just kidding about the McDonald’s part, there’s not enough junk food in the free world to fill up that greasy pig, the cops did have to be called in to calm things down though. Life must really be a bitch when everyone wakes up and realizes you’re a nobody. Yours truly wouldn’t know about such things of course.

Source: Dlisted

More has-been pics here: Read more »

Paris Hilton on giving oral sex:

“My mom told me that you get those holes in your face, craters… from giving blow jobs. I totally believed her. She’s like, ‘It’s from sucking.’ I’m like, ‘Ewwww!’

“I told my boyfriend - he’s like, ‘Why don’t you ever do that?’ I’m like, ‘Because my mom told me you get these craters.’ And he’s like, ‘Paris, you’re 19. You’re allowed to do this.’ I’ve only done that (fellatio) with maybe three people in my life.”

I guess some sort of noise must have drowned out Paris saying “million” after the “three” in that last quote, because “three” is most likely the number of men she did all at once on her first ride out.

Source: Dlisted

Neilsen SoundScan reports Paris Hilton’s first CD is a certified flop. The self titled “Paris”, which features the single “Stars Are Blind,” sold a poor 75,000 copies in the United States, lackluster compared to Christina Aguilera’s first-week sales of 320,000 for her CD “Back To Basics”.

Hilton’s label rushed out her second single, “Turn It Up,” when they learned next week’s projected sales for her musical fiasco are estimated to be about 30,000, a larger than average second week drop. That single didn’t do well either.

One industry source told gossip column Page Six “The international outlook is not much better for her. The international people are not inclined to do a big push since she can’t back up the album with a tour. Obviously, she can’t sing live.” The source added that Hilton was advised a year ago to train her voice, work with choreographers and learn an instrument to prepare for a limited tour, but “obviously she didn’t listen.”

Something tells me Paris isn’t too concerned, everyone knows going out every night, spreading her legs for anything that moves, starting feuds with young Hollywood starlets and hacking into other people’s voicemail accounts are far more important to her than some silly old record company’s investments. “Stars” might be “blind” but the public is not and karma is still the bigger bitch.

Asians and black people should never go blonde, it rarely ever looks right. So what made Kimora Lee Simmons, who is both asian and black, think she could pull it off? A hairdresser from the Helen Keller School of Beauty who was tripping on magic mushrooms perhaps.

Hidi Lee Simmons showed off her new golden locks this past weekend on Access Hollywood where she was a guest reporter on the show. After splashing cold water on my scorched retinas and downing half a bottle of whisky, I gathered the strength to search the net for evidence of this heinous apparition and thankfully came up with pic courtesy of Dlisted.

And as if this horrific sight wasn’t enough, here are some highlights of Kimora’s antics on the set of her now canceled TV show “Life & Style,” direct from the mouths of her costars:

Kimora Lee Simmons Killed Own Show

- Kimora missed 35 episodes and gave wild excuses - like being in extended mourning for her dead cat.

- Kimora called the other hosts - Jules Asner, Cynthia Garrett and Lynne Koplitz - “bitches and hos” and once berated a Teleprompter operator so badly that he quit on the spot.

- She stole props such as lamps and once made off with an entire rack of lamb from the lunch buffet table. Staff routinely had to be dispatched to the sticky-fingered star’s dressing room in order to recover the pilfered booty.

- The statuesque former model also threatened to beat up an eight-month pregnant assistant, prompting weary producers to send the woman home to avert trouble.

- But perhaps the lowest point came when she supposedly had donuts delivered to the set, then licked each and every one so nobody else could eat them.

My ultimate Celebrity Death Match: Kimora Lee Simmons vs Nomi Campbell. Just imagine all the horse hair and cheap wigs that’ll have to be cleaned up after that fight.