From IMDB, 11/30/04:

Farrell and Hilton’s Intimate Encounter

Irish lothario Colin Farrell reportedly enjoyed a romantic liaison with American socialite Paris Hilton last week. The Phone Booth hunk was promoting his new film Alexander when he bumped into the blonde heiress, who was being filmed for Barbara Walters’ TV show The Ten Most Fascinating People Of 2004.

A source tell Scotland’s Daily Record newspaper, “Colin is a lot hotter in person and Paris was unbelievably sweet. But it was not clear, though, whether the couple had previously arranged a meeting or it was just coincidence. Still, what happens when the two most oversexed people on the planet get together - they continued the party, alone, after the cameras shut off.”

Hilton has been romantically linked to a host of famous men, including Backstreet Boy Nick Carter, former porn star Simon Rex, Leonardo DiCaprio, Jamie Kennedy, Sum 41 singer Deryck Whibley and Australian Idol contestant Rob Mills. Meanwhile, Farrell has a baby son James with ex-love Kim Bordenave.

My 2 Cents:

Forget crabs, this pairing must have produced the world’s first case of lobsters. The thought of these two human Petri dishes consummating their mutual admiration for each other is not the least bit sexy.

From filmthreat.com:

Film Threat - Features

FILM THREAT’S FRIGID 50: THE COLDEST PEOPLE IN HOLLYWOOD 2004 (1-10)
by the Film Threat Staff
(11/23/2004)

1. MICHAEL MOORE
Well, the results of the Presidential election are in and the controversial documentary Fahrenheit 9/11 did not derail a second Bush term. Michael Moore’s box office smash did two things: it mobilized like-minded Americans in a bid to vote a Democrat into office, and it galvanized the opposition in a bid to re-elect Bush. Bush won. There are a lot of Democrats out there that would just like to say — thanks a lot! MICHAEL!

And now Michael’s alleged “limousine liberal” ways are being exposed in a new documentary entitled “Michael Moore Hates America.” (Incidentally, “Michael Moore Hates America” received a coveted “Thumbs Up” from Roger Ebert when it was reviewed on his program.) The film (hitting theaters in limited release) features regular schlub Mike Wilson who seeks out Moore in an effort to question the controversial filmmaker’s techniques. All Wilson wants is to interview Michael –and ala “Roger and Me,” Moore completely disses the young filmmaker, evading his request for an interview and berating him at a public event. In one particularly damning sequence, Wilson exposes that in Bowling for Columbine the sequence in which the gun is received from the bank was completely stage-managed. The bank employees reveal how Michael set up the entire scene.

“Michael Moore Hates America” takes a hard look at Moore’s methods while dissecting the documentary form itself. It’s a doc that tackles ethical issues when reality gets in the way of a political agenda — and all the while the film remains highly entertaining. Kind of like Michael Moore’s movies.

But, hey, look on the bright side; no Presidential candidate endorsed by Michael Moore has ever won an election. So, Michael, why not endorse a Republican in 2008, just to see what happens? You never know, it might work! But do we really need a sequel to Fahrenheit 9/11?
Anti-Freeze: Remember, it’s not always about you. Lose the chip on your shoulder. Really. Morgan Spurlock beautifully attacked McDonald’s in the funny, clever and factually accurate “Super Size Me.” You could learn something from that approach; you used to do that so well yourself.

2. HALLE BERRY
If she makes any more muck along the lines of Gothika and Catwoman, the Academy should send Berry a self-addressed stamped envelope and a letter requesting the return of her Oscar. Her post-Oscar film choices have demonstrated a passionate commitment to doing anything for a buck. And the award for “Least Artistic Integrity on the Part of an Oscar Winner” goes to… who else?
Anti-Freeze: Send back the Oscar, because that’s one peak she’s not reaching again.

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From banterist.com

Banterist - Helpful Plastic Surgery Tips

Plastic surgery works best when not a manifestation of inner turmoil and despair.

When confronted with your husband and a young woman having sex, consider plastic surgery to be an option. However, divorce and Second Degree Homicide under Mental Duress are also viable options worth considering, especially when plastic surgery may fail to win your philandering husband back.

Putting $50,000 into your kitchen leads to a better kitchen. Putting $50,000 into your face does not necessarily lead to a better face. This is because your face is not a kitchen.

To judge the success of your plastic surgery, stand outside. If people try to chase you off of a cliff with pitchforks, consider finding another plastic surgeon and getting a second opinion.

That said, individuals who make their living performing plastic surgery are not likely to admit you do not need plastic surgery. This is true of most professions. A car salesman will always try to sell you a car, even if you resemble the front-end of a Dodge Durango 4-Wheel Drive.

Moderation is not a vice. If your Day Runner contains notations such as “Get plastic surgery” more than three times in a given month, you are in danger of being overzealous.

Some alternatives to plastic surgery include: strategic use of blush and eye-liner, brushing teeth, and encouraging others to love you for who you really are.

If who you really are has been completely replaced by the monstrous visage you have created, stay indoors and watch Twilight Zone episodes Eye of the Beholder, A Short Drink From A Certain Fountain and Number Twelve Looks Just Like You. You will be somewhat comforted and well prepared for your deathbed epilogue - to be delivered by Rod Serling.

“Brooklyn is where fashions goes to die.”

“Don’t wait for someone to give it to you, buy one for yourself”, ( talking about a ring in Isaac’s top five things things you must have ).

From IMDB:

Kidman and Bing Kiss the Night Away

Nicole Kidman and Elizabeth Hurley’s ex-boyfriend Steve Bing have fuelled reports they’re dating, by passionately kissing across a Los Angeles restaurant table.

Last week it was reported the movie pair had enjoyed a series of dinner dates in New York, culminating in two romantic meals at the Il Cantinori restaurant in Greenwich Village.

And now Kidman and billionaire film producer Bing - the father of Hurley’s two-year-old baby Damian - have been spotted acting intimately at the Polo Lounge in Beverly Hills.

One stunned diner tells Britain’s The Sun newspaper, “Everyone had candles on their tables, but they blew theirs out. It wasn’t some little kiss - it was an open-mouthed lip-lock.”

Neighbors have also seen Bing’s car parked outside the apartment Kidman’s renting while she films new movie Bewitched, according to The Sun.

Bing sparked a media frenzy in 2002 when he split up with pregnant Hurley, denying he was the child’s father. DNA tests later proved he was.

From darkhorizons.com:

Posted: Tuesday November 16th, 2004 10:09pm
Author: Garth Franklin

Almost everytime two people share a same sex kiss in a major Hollywood movie, at least one of those involved has their publicist usually issue some asshole of a statement saying how “difficult, uncomfortable and awkward” it was to do a gay kiss. It’s a feeble attempt to reassure the stars ‘masculinity’/'femininity’ at best, an insulting derogatory indictment at worst.

That’s why in a surprisingly amusing article today, Jake Gyllenhaal admitted to Digital Spy that while his gay love scenes with Heath Ledger in Ang Lee’s “Brokeback Mountain” were tough, it wasn’t for the reasons that most PR hacks would have you believe.

Gyllenhaal says “Heath almost broke my nose in a kissing scene. He grabs me and he slams me up against the wall and kisses me, and then I grab him and I slam him up against the wall and I kiss him. And we were doing take after take after take. I got the shit beat out of me. We had other scenes where we fought each other and I wasn’t hurting as badly as I did after that one.”

CNN.com - 18ft shark attacks beach swimmer - Nov 16, 2004

CAPE TOWN, South Africa (AP) — A Great White shark estimated to be at least 18 feet long (5.5 meters) has attacked and presumably killed an elderly South African woman off a beach near Cape Town, officials said.

Tyna Webb, 77, who lived in the area, was swimming Monday off Sunny Cove in Fish Hoek when the massive shark circled her and then attacked, witnesses and officials said. About 15 people witnessed the attack.

“All that was left was a little red bathing cap,” said Paul Dennett, who witnessed the attack from his home nearby. Dennett told the South African Press Association that he estimated the shark to be at least 18 feet long.

Rescue workers were using boats and aircraft to search for the woman’s body. “All efforts to find the lady have been exhausted by a wide and thorough search. We are hoping that police divers will be successful in their efforts,” Darren Zimmerman of the National Sea Rescue Institute told the SAPA. Crews later spotted the shark.

Great Whites often are seen in the area feeding off the large seal population. “The shark is bigger than the helicopter … it is huge,” institute spokesman Craig Lambinon told SAPA. Law enforcement officials advised people not to swim along the Cape of Good Hope. A 16-year-old surfer lost his right leg in an April attack by a Great White shark in the same area.

The last confirmed, unprovoked fatal shark attack in South Africa was in 2003, according to the Florida Museum of Natural History’s International Shark Attack File, which has gathered such data worldwide for decades.

The 18-foot Great White ( above ) can be seen playfully teasing the near-by spectators moments after his inauspicious debut.

When asked why he didn’t devour the famed red swimming cap as well, the shark ( who’s real identity is Bruce Devito from Elmhurst, NY ) stated “Tacky, tacky, tacky! In my opinion wearing red bathing caps with a full peice this late in the season is just as bad as wearing white after Labor Day…except maybe on Holidays of course.”

Mr. Devito then added “Cape Town isn’t exactly known as a fashion mecca, someone had to make a statement and stop the madness. If you just sit back and don’t do anything, next thing you know they’ll be bringing back Capezios and making it acceptable.”

Mr. Devito plans on vacationing at Cape Town through the end of November before returning home to Elmhurst and his job as a buyer for Target.

Some news today from the always informative IMDB:

Zellweger Slams Diet-Mad Public

Renee Zellweger has blasted fans who quiz her on her impressive post- Bridget Jones weight loss, urging them to seek value in the more important things in life. The actress - who had to pile on the pounds again for sequel Bridget Jones: The Edge Of Reason - sparked a media frenzy when she rapidly returned to her skinny frame after fattening up for 2001’s Bridget Jones’s Diary. But angry Zellweger is offended by people who approach her on the street in search of diet tips - because she’s an actress, not a food expert. She says, “To tell you the truth, that really upsets me, because it says so much about what we value in our society. Besides, I’m not an authority on weight loss. If you want to know how to gain weight, then maybe I can help you with that. How? Food and more food.”

Anna Nicole Stumbles at the AMAs

Fans of busty Anna Nicole Smith are fearing for the model’s sanity after her rambling Kanye West introduction at the American Music Awards on Sunday night. Smith, who arrived at the show 10 minutes after it had started, appeared drunk onstage, and her short speech, which began as she slurred, “Like my body?” was cut short when producers feared she would do something shameful. But she insists her current state of mind has been swayed by her recent weight loss and constant taunts about being stupid. She explains, “I liked me better bigger because now I’m too bony. I’m just portrayed as some bimbo, and never taken seriously.” Smith then staggered around backstage, and had to be helped to stand up by two bodyguards.

My 2 cents: I liked the “bigger” Anna as well, she was the perfect candidate to take over as John Waters next muse ( ala Devine or Edith Massey ). I petition to get a stamp with her likeness and start the whole “skinny Anna” versus “fat Anna” debate as they did with Elvis years ago. Hey, if the trailer park fits…

From NewsDay:

Usually, clothing chain H&M nabs ideas from top designers. This time, it snatched the designer himself, Chanel’s Karl Lagerfeld. Lagerfeld’s cheap but chic winter collection for the masses will debut in malls Nov. 12. It’s sleek, silky and mostly black. But the real buzz is the price. The least expensive piece, black silk georgette knickers, will sell for about $20 while the most expensive, a double-breasted black wool coat, goes for $150. That’s a far cry from prices at Chanel, where the average tweed suit costs somewhere around $5,000.

Lagerfeld, who appeared at a late-night launch party Friday in Paris wearing his trademark black sunglasses and white ponytail, said he admires the Swedish retail chain for making “the inexpensive desirable.” “I’m versatile, and fashion is too,” he told reporters. “I did this (collection) with the same kind of seriousness as for Chanel. Just because it’s less expensive doesn’t mean we shouldn’t care.”

Lagerfeld also designed H&M accessories and a unisex fragrance called “Liquid Karl.” He’s not the first designer to adapt his clothes for the masses, Target tapped designer Isaac Mizrahi, for example.

Footnote: The news had a story on the Lagerfeld/H&M venture this afternoon. The lines waiting to get into H&M this morning were out of control as an unprecedented number of shoppers swooped down on the retail chain to snag up every piece of the so-called “collection”. They went on to report they expect the collection to sell out by the end of this weekend, bringing in an estimated 10 million dollars in just three days.

From Page Six:
New York Post Online Edition: gossip

Move-In Time

Is sexy actress Saffron Burrows (top left) planning to go public with a lesbian love affair?

The tasty “Troy” startlet, 31, is shacking up with “Harry Potter” actress Fiona Shaw, 45, reports the London Sun, which says they plan to make an announcement soon.

Burrows, who recently moved into Shaw’s North London pad, once told an interviewer, “I don’t think who I sleep with is of any interest to anyone.”

A pal told the paper, “They’ve been together for a while but the relationship has moved up a gear and they want to commit to each other.”

Her rep had no comment.

Without a doubt, one of the most beautiful commercials ever filmed.

No. 5 - The Film stars Nicole Kidman as an actress on the run, who finds love on a building rooftop against the backdrop of a surreal New York City landscape.

Director Baz Luhrmann ( Moulin Rouge, La Boheme, Romeo + Juliet ) beautifully weaves the tale much as he did with Moulin Rouge, making use of special effects and elaborate sets to depict a cityscape which resembles an impressionist painting.

Tonight’s exclusive NBC “one-time only” airing will be followed by subsequent showings in movie theatres during film previews .

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